Ordered a croissant, guy asked me "you want it warm?", I said yes, I got a flattened half warm croissant

Yeah, it’s normal haha, they put it on a toaster.
I actually like it, but I hate it when they just put it there for like 30 seconds so the cheese doesn’t get enough time to get warm.

So sorry you experienced this, but it’s just cultural shock. This is pretty normal in Portugal. When you ask to warm a croissant it means to press warm it. Source: I’m a native.